You wake up late to the smell of coffee and the sizzle of bacon crisping up. The sun streams into the tent, as you unzip it, fresh air floods in. Gentle music drifts towards you, the folkiness of a melodeon or a favourite song you had almost forgotten. Someone hands you a fresh coffee and a bacon butty made with love and soft white bread and you sit in the doorway of the tent on an airbed that hasn't deflated at all overnight, watching the festival site waking up.
Isn't this what happens to you every morning at festivals?
OK, ok, this is not a true record of my own experience. I have Earl Grey not coffee. The bed is flat and feels like rocks, and the sound that often seems to herald the morning is this lot (even when they're ironically playing Brahm's Lullaby, they're anything but soothing).
If in reality you lie there trying to work out if you can hear rain or whether it's the sound of many flags flapping, and you realise that much as you don't want to get up, if you lie here much longer on your deflated airbed you might not be able to get up at all (how does a muddy field feel like rocks anyway?), then what you need to do is to grab a cuppa and make your way to the games tent.
So come visit us at Shepley Spring Festival - May 19th - 21st. Come into our lovely red gazebo, we'll look after you. We'll sit you in a nice proper seat, wrap you in soft blankets and teach you games to distract you from your back pain. After all the sound of rain is soothing - it must be true, the internet says so...
...and doubly soothing with the sound of falling Jenga blocks and connect four clattering down...